American aid worker, Peter Kassig: A letter to my parents

American aid worker, Peter Kassig, a Muslim convert have been beheaded by the Islamic State militants on Sunday. Mr. Kassig works as a medical care provider for victims of Syria's civil war before he was captured. While in captivity, he wrote a letter to his family.

          It is still really hard to believe all of this is really happening as I am sure you know by now, things have been getting pretty intense. We have been held together, us foreigners and now about half the people have gone home. I hope that this all has a happy ending but it may very well be coming down to the wire here, and if in fact that is the case then I figured it was time to say a few things that need saying before I have to go.

          The first thing I want to say is thank you. Both to you and mom for everything you have both done for me as a parents; for everything you have taught me, shown me, and experienced with me. I cannot imagine the strength and commitment it has taken to raise a son like me but your love and patience are things I am so deeply grateful for.

          Secondly, I want you to know about things here and what I've been through straight from me so you don't have to wonder, guess or imagine (often this is worse than the reality). All in all I am alright. Physically I am pretty under weight but I'm not starved and I have no physical injuries, I'm a tough kid and still young so that helps.
Mentally I am pretty sure this is the hardest thing a man can go through, the stress and fear are incredible but I am coping as best I can. I am not alone. I have friends, we laugh, we play chess, we play trivia to stay sharp, and we share stories and dreams of home and loved ones. I can be hard to deal with, you know me. My mind is quick and my patience thinner that most.

But all in all I am holding my own. I cried a lot in the first few months but a little less now. I worry a lot about you and mom and my friends. I am obviously pretty scared to die but the hardest part is not knowing, wondering, hoping and wondering if I should even hope at all. I am very sad that all this has happened and for what all of you back home are going through. If I do die, I figure that at least you and I can take refuge and comfort in knowing that I went out as a result of trying to alleviate suffering and helping those in need.
In terms of my faith, I pray everyday and I am not angry about my situation in that sense. I am in a dogmatically complicated situation here, but I am at piece with my belief.

I wish this paper would go on forever and never run out and I could just keep talking to you. Just know I am with you. Every stream, every lake, every field and river. In the woods and in the hills, in all the places you showed me. I love you.